I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize