Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
