he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Randomize
