I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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