It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at about main and main street
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize