She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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