i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
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