Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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