I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
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