my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize