So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
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We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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