quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
