I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
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