Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Randomize
