i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Randomize