I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize