Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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