They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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