AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
