woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
