I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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