Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
