im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
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