Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
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