I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize