Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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