I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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