Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
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Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
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Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
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