I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
