Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
