She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hippo gnu deer
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
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