Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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