: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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