Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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