Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize