I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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