My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
She needs sedatives and a leash
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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