I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
Randomize
