This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Randomize
