Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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