Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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