It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
My life is pants optional.
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