I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
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