Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
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