Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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