so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
You smell like stripper and shame
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Randomize
