Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize