i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
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I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
It was like giving head to a cactus.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
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i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
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