somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Randomize