Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
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