Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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