first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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